My favorite line of yours that unlocked a lot for me was "Women are not defective men." Hopefully short enough to put on a sticker, definitely deep enough to start a conversation!
For Mutual Dependence bingo, my suggestions are:
- offer someone a ride, ask for a ride, or organize a carpool
- do something that improves a community resource (restock a Little Free Pantry or Little Free Library, pick up litter in a park or on a sidewalk, etc)
- buy a stepstool and place it in a restroom to make it more kid friendly (h/t to Dixie Dillon Lane on this one!)
- ask for advice or help from someone you've never asked for advice or help before
- thank someone who has offered you help in the past
Ooh another bingo thought: something related to a *physical, bodily* need (like wiping the spitup from the back of my arm where I couldn't reach, true story) and something related to a *non-physical need* (like listening to a problem and brainstorming solutions)
"There is something else about this practice that I think is particularly Christian: it asks us to experience dependence.
"We don’t like to depend on other people. We prize independence, especially in American culture. Being able to drive wherever we want, whenever we want, has been sold to us for decades as the greatest marker of American independence.
...
"But none of us is actually independent.
...
"And we depend on infrastructure that costs something from someone else."
- Invite someone for a meal OR go to someone's house for a meal. Bonus if they are a demographic mismatch (e.g., a family inviting a single friend and their roommate, or older folks inviting younger). Yes, it has to be a meal; no, it doesn't have to be fancy.
- Invite someone along for an errand (e.g., meet up at the grocery store for the shopping we both need to do).
More like: "Convo that had sharing of 'what's really going on'."
Btw, one of these times (probably last Mutual Dependence Bingo Board) ...possibly even before I had gotten into producing mini painting app artifacts with Claude... (it's great!) I was like: "I should make a web app for people to check of Mutual Dependence Bingo for people for whom image-editing program use is a hassle."
ok so for the bingo chart, I'd put asking for help for a thing that people don't normally ask for help with. I was just talking with a friend a couple hours ago about how when we have new babies, we get swarmed with help and meals, which is great... but we both felt that we needed more help during our first trimesters (when we didn't have a cute baby to show off!) than postpartum. And yet... even in our thriving mom economy that we have here (which is truly a treasure), where we support and help each other a lot, it still feels weird to ask for first-trimester help.
I like turquoise, but my kids are little and I'm always over stimulated! So I personally would vote against neon anything. My kids ask me what my favorite color is and I always find myself saying something like, "I like gentle colors."
I'm a few chapters into The Dignity of Dependence and I had this realization: given that our society tends to view dependence as weakness, it's not particularly surprising to see AI usage embraced. It's often framed as a tool that we can decide how we will use it, negating it's usage as being dependent (at least on a person). If you worry you might be inconveniencing someone to talk and process a difficult situation - AI could "do" that. Why bother asking a friend for a new recipe to try or how they manage dinners each week when you could ask a chatbot for a meal plan?
This is a great point. I use Claude for some kinds of research, but I try to be thoughtful about whether I do know someone in person who could give me advice and asking would reinforce our friendship
So I asked friends who have been to Berlin for broad recommendations and I asked Claude to look at my goodreads and recommend contemporary German fiction under 250 pages that I might enjoy in translation
Because of the size of a sticker probably only one silhouette is possible. Whether or if there’s an image depends on the text, and for the initial sticker, it’s the image from my book so people connect the two
Replace a paid service with a friend service swap
My favorite line of yours that unlocked a lot for me was "Women are not defective men." Hopefully short enough to put on a sticker, definitely deep enough to start a conversation!
For Mutual Dependence bingo, my suggestions are:
- offer someone a ride, ask for a ride, or organize a carpool
- do something that improves a community resource (restock a Little Free Pantry or Little Free Library, pick up litter in a park or on a sidewalk, etc)
- buy a stepstool and place it in a restroom to make it more kid friendly (h/t to Dixie Dillon Lane on this one!)
- ask for advice or help from someone you've never asked for advice or help before
- thank someone who has offered you help in the past
- donate to a local mutual aid group
Agreed, "Women are not defective men" is my favorite too
Ooh another bingo thought: something related to a *physical, bodily* need (like wiping the spitup from the back of my arm where I couldn't reach, true story) and something related to a *non-physical need* (like listening to a problem and brainstorming solutions)
And this crossed my feed at a timely moment: https://jesusurbanist.substack.com/p/a-week-without-driving-as-a-spiritual
"There is something else about this practice that I think is particularly Christian: it asks us to experience dependence.
"We don’t like to depend on other people. We prize independence, especially in American culture. Being able to drive wherever we want, whenever we want, has been sold to us for decades as the greatest marker of American independence.
...
"But none of us is actually independent.
...
"And we depend on infrastructure that costs something from someone else."
A few bingo ideas!
- host a game night
- make art with another family
- go on a neighborhood walk with a friend
- walk someone else's dog
- host a neighborhood potluck at a park / rec center
Potential mutual dependence bingo ideas:
- Invite someone for a meal OR go to someone's house for a meal. Bonus if they are a demographic mismatch (e.g., a family inviting a single friend and their roommate, or older folks inviting younger). Yes, it has to be a meal; no, it doesn't have to be fancy.
- Invite someone along for an errand (e.g., meet up at the grocery store for the shopping we both need to do).
- Delegate a task. (Interpret however you like.)
- Borrow something OR lend something.
"Cried on a neighbor's couch" - just kidding!
More like: "Convo that had sharing of 'what's really going on'."
Btw, one of these times (probably last Mutual Dependence Bingo Board) ...possibly even before I had gotten into producing mini painting app artifacts with Claude... (it's great!) I was like: "I should make a web app for people to check of Mutual Dependence Bingo for people for whom image-editing program use is a hassle."
…something very similar is coming
My biggest complaint about your book is that it's hot pink! Is there any chance the stickers would come in a different color?
I think that's a very reasonable ask for Second Sticker!
ok so for the bingo chart, I'd put asking for help for a thing that people don't normally ask for help with. I was just talking with a friend a couple hours ago about how when we have new babies, we get swarmed with help and meals, which is great... but we both felt that we needed more help during our first trimesters (when we didn't have a cute baby to show off!) than postpartum. And yet... even in our thriving mom economy that we have here (which is truly a treasure), where we support and help each other a lot, it still feels weird to ask for first-trimester help.
a nice gender neutral turquoise maybe? to stick with the neon theme
I like turquoise, but my kids are little and I'm always over stimulated! So I personally would vote against neon anything. My kids ask me what my favorite color is and I always find myself saying something like, "I like gentle colors."
I'm a few chapters into The Dignity of Dependence and I had this realization: given that our society tends to view dependence as weakness, it's not particularly surprising to see AI usage embraced. It's often framed as a tool that we can decide how we will use it, negating it's usage as being dependent (at least on a person). If you worry you might be inconveniencing someone to talk and process a difficult situation - AI could "do" that. Why bother asking a friend for a new recipe to try or how they manage dinners each week when you could ask a chatbot for a meal plan?
This is a great point. I use Claude for some kinds of research, but I try to be thoughtful about whether I do know someone in person who could give me advice and asking would reinforce our friendship
So I asked friends who have been to Berlin for broad recommendations and I asked Claude to look at my goodreads and recommend contemporary German fiction under 250 pages that I might enjoy in translation
May I suggest that if your next sticker features an image of a person, that it include different body types, hair textures, and disabilities?
Because of the size of a sticker probably only one silhouette is possible. Whether or if there’s an image depends on the text, and for the initial sticker, it’s the image from my book so people connect the two