The most "different-from-my-norms" place where I was invited, was to a birthday party for my 4-year-old great-grand-daughter. At the party were her older teenage sisters, one of whom had a new baby and lives with her father and stepmother, her two brothers, an unmarried friend with a one-year-old baby, and other friends. I went with the hope of telling these family members of my own regrets, in the hope of convincing them that marrying a Christian and raising kids in a full-out praying things through family would be better than the choices I had made at their ages. I wisely abandoned this approach at once, and just listened to what they wanted to tell me. So at least, the bonds between us were strengthened.
I don't mean to rain on your parade, but the VAST majority of what we see from the Right these days, coming from the very top and permeating the whole movement, is "Libs are gross and evil and we loathe them and want them to suffer." I still know lots of people in the social conservative movement in which I worked for decades, and I see this attitude everywhere. Your goals are commendable, but if your hope is to take that movement and direct it "to credibly present ourselves as rooting for others to find happiness," I'm afraid you've got your work cut out for you.
I don’t disagree descriptively! I think this tendency also exists on the left directed right, but it’s less exuberant/more fringe-y for now.
This is pretty corrosive to politics and persons. I push back where I have a shot. And writing this for commonplace was a good opportunity to reach people who might be persuadable.
I suppose RFK Jr. believes death (instead of intellectual disability) is the good of his opponents, and that Mullin and Miller believe to be tortured or left to rot in prison in a strange country is the good of immigrants’.
My chief question for Dr. Loftus is how, in an effort to avoid Category 1 errors (overtreatment/overdiagnosis), we can avoid swinging into a Category 2 error (withholding treatment from those who most benefit from psychiatric treatment).
How do you navigate conversations with dear friends who are steeped in a therapy-as-worldview mindset? More specifically, when conversation becomes so littered with watered down therapy jargon, overused or inappropriately used, what's the best way to keep the conversation going without endorsing/encouraging this misguided approach, or pausing the conversation to argue about the topic of therapy culture?
And what about when such people start "diagnosing" everyone in your family?! Yes my six-year-old son stood up three times during dinner. No I don't think he needs to be tested for ADHD.
About classical schools....After my parents divorced, my mother hovered between two good schools. One was the University of Illinois Lab School, which was hard to get into. That school offered a "subfreshman" year that combined 7th and 8th grade study into one school year. The other was the local Catholic school, which had a superb music program. My mother had taught me to love music, and she also wanted challenging study for me after I had eased through grade school without ever having to work. I was accepted at the lab school, so I went there. It turned out that Girl Scouts and church were not intellectual enough there -- and being around college students wasn't good for me either. If I had a choice now, I'd choose the Catholic school. I had wanted to become Catholic as a child. But who knows how that would have worked out? As Aslan says, "you can never know what would have happened had you made a different choice."
About schooling: I just want to add that I get twitchy when I see Catholics looking down on public schools. My children (one of whom is significantly disabled) all have IEPs, and even if we could afford it the Catholic and private schools in our area won’t accept them for that reason. The public schools, however, are required to, and I am lucky enough to live in an area where a lot of services and help are available through the DoE. More importantly, the teachers themselves, with very few exceptions, have wonderful and truly dedicated to their calling.
The Catholic Church rightly condemns the abortion of disabled children, but Catholic schools won’t educate them. There is a real disconnect there, and it shouldn’t be ignored.
We're big fans of the FIRE foundation which raises funds and support for Catholic schools to integrate students with disabilities—you're right that this is our duty: https://firefoundation.org/
Our local public school was never an option for us: Chromebooks for kindergartners.
I really do mean this sincerely, not flippantly, Leah: could you name a national right-wing figure (assuming that is how you now identify yourself) who credibly communicates that they will the good of their opponents? It is hard for me to name one without resorting to the painful thought that no Republican in Congress or the executive branch believes their opponents deserve dignity or flourishing. (I’m disinclined to include mayors or governors; any “national figures” among them are only so because of media attention.)
In other words, it’s hard to play this fair-and-balanced game when one side has discarded the moral rulebook.
Most of them have explicitly left politics (Ben Sasse, Mitch Daniels, etc). Katie Britt is probably the closest of sitting congresspeople.
It's much more common among ordinary people, of course.
I identify primarily as Catholic, which places me at the horseshoe in horseshoe politics as often as not. I have the opportunity to write for conservative audiences about the threats of moral error within that movement much more often than I would be trusted to write for left-wing audiences about errors within that movement, so more of my exhortations to choose a better course are directed right.
Fascinating. Thing is, I don't disagree with you, but I also can't think of a single national left-wing figure who credibly communicates that they will the good of their opponents.
Inviting single people and young couples into the joy of family life is all well and good, but how does that make achieving family life more practical for young people? It is far more difficult for young people to buy houses today than it was decades ago, and as much as we want marriage to be the cornerstone, not capstone of adult life, family life can seem unattainable when buying, not a mansion, but a modest three bedroom two bathroom is out of reach. Although egg freezing is expensive, it’s less expensive than a house
Well, in my day job, I work on expanding the legality of infill and other ways to build housing, which I agree is one of the biggest affordability pressures on young families.
"Our job on the Right"-- you consider yourself "on the right" when you believe in the "dignity of dependence"? The only dependence the Right finds dignified is when the fetus is inside the uterus. Supporters of the Big Beautiful Bill abhor vulnerability.
Question for Matthew from a fellow former Baltimorean:
Loved your book overall, but would've liked to see psych meds get a more thorough/critical treatment. At one point in the section on the topic (I think around page 75), you called the "chemical imbalance" metaphor simplistic - but my understanding is that it's entirely unfounded, a marketing ploy with no research basis. Considering that as many as 1 in 6 American adults are taking a psych med now, and that the severity and frequency of adverse effects and withdrawal symptoms have been downplayed and understudied until recently... I would have loved to read more from you on all that. Care to poke that bear?
I read the review of "Resisting Therapy Culture" with great interest. This topic has come up in a weekly zoom gathering on the topic of Revival, hosted by the OSL SC group. (OSL stands for the Order of St. Luke, the Physician), where I'm studying healing prayer. My first career (before becoming a blacksmith and then a painter) was as a facilitator of personal growth and as a consultant on organizational development. It took quite a long time for me to learn to invite the Holy Spirit into each group or workshop. Some of the OSL members in classes and other gatherings have successfully integrated therapy with healing prayer, just as many medical doctors do. It isn't easy. My current work is easier, because I know I can't make paintings with any healing power, and put them where people are disheartened, without Jesus and the Spirit. I'd drown in the waves of marketing advice.
The most "different-from-my-norms" place where I was invited, was to a birthday party for my 4-year-old great-grand-daughter. At the party were her older teenage sisters, one of whom had a new baby and lives with her father and stepmother, her two brothers, an unmarried friend with a one-year-old baby, and other friends. I went with the hope of telling these family members of my own regrets, in the hope of convincing them that marrying a Christian and raising kids in a full-out praying things through family would be better than the choices I had made at their ages. I wisely abandoned this approach at once, and just listened to what they wanted to tell me. So at least, the bonds between us were strengthened.
I don't mean to rain on your parade, but the VAST majority of what we see from the Right these days, coming from the very top and permeating the whole movement, is "Libs are gross and evil and we loathe them and want them to suffer." I still know lots of people in the social conservative movement in which I worked for decades, and I see this attitude everywhere. Your goals are commendable, but if your hope is to take that movement and direct it "to credibly present ourselves as rooting for others to find happiness," I'm afraid you've got your work cut out for you.
I don’t disagree descriptively! I think this tendency also exists on the left directed right, but it’s less exuberant/more fringe-y for now.
This is pretty corrosive to politics and persons. I push back where I have a shot. And writing this for commonplace was a good opportunity to reach people who might be persuadable.
I suppose RFK Jr. believes death (instead of intellectual disability) is the good of his opponents, and that Mullin and Miller believe to be tortured or left to rot in prison in a strange country is the good of immigrants’.
My chief question for Dr. Loftus is how, in an effort to avoid Category 1 errors (overtreatment/overdiagnosis), we can avoid swinging into a Category 2 error (withholding treatment from those who most benefit from psychiatric treatment).
I have a question for Matthew:
How do you navigate conversations with dear friends who are steeped in a therapy-as-worldview mindset? More specifically, when conversation becomes so littered with watered down therapy jargon, overused or inappropriately used, what's the best way to keep the conversation going without endorsing/encouraging this misguided approach, or pausing the conversation to argue about the topic of therapy culture?
And what about when such people start "diagnosing" everyone in your family?! Yes my six-year-old son stood up three times during dinner. No I don't think he needs to be tested for ADHD.
"When bedtime starts, we don’t send our guests home but instead invite them upstairs to read picture books to our children."
Oh, we'll be trying this! (Thanks!)
About classical schools....After my parents divorced, my mother hovered between two good schools. One was the University of Illinois Lab School, which was hard to get into. That school offered a "subfreshman" year that combined 7th and 8th grade study into one school year. The other was the local Catholic school, which had a superb music program. My mother had taught me to love music, and she also wanted challenging study for me after I had eased through grade school without ever having to work. I was accepted at the lab school, so I went there. It turned out that Girl Scouts and church were not intellectual enough there -- and being around college students wasn't good for me either. If I had a choice now, I'd choose the Catholic school. I had wanted to become Catholic as a child. But who knows how that would have worked out? As Aslan says, "you can never know what would have happened had you made a different choice."
About schooling: I just want to add that I get twitchy when I see Catholics looking down on public schools. My children (one of whom is significantly disabled) all have IEPs, and even if we could afford it the Catholic and private schools in our area won’t accept them for that reason. The public schools, however, are required to, and I am lucky enough to live in an area where a lot of services and help are available through the DoE. More importantly, the teachers themselves, with very few exceptions, have wonderful and truly dedicated to their calling.
The Catholic Church rightly condemns the abortion of disabled children, but Catholic schools won’t educate them. There is a real disconnect there, and it shouldn’t be ignored.
We're big fans of the FIRE foundation which raises funds and support for Catholic schools to integrate students with disabilities—you're right that this is our duty: https://firefoundation.org/
Our local public school was never an option for us: Chromebooks for kindergartners.
I really do mean this sincerely, not flippantly, Leah: could you name a national right-wing figure (assuming that is how you now identify yourself) who credibly communicates that they will the good of their opponents? It is hard for me to name one without resorting to the painful thought that no Republican in Congress or the executive branch believes their opponents deserve dignity or flourishing. (I’m disinclined to include mayors or governors; any “national figures” among them are only so because of media attention.)
In other words, it’s hard to play this fair-and-balanced game when one side has discarded the moral rulebook.
Most of them have explicitly left politics (Ben Sasse, Mitch Daniels, etc). Katie Britt is probably the closest of sitting congresspeople.
It's much more common among ordinary people, of course.
I identify primarily as Catholic, which places me at the horseshoe in horseshoe politics as often as not. I have the opportunity to write for conservative audiences about the threats of moral error within that movement much more often than I would be trusted to write for left-wing audiences about errors within that movement, so more of my exhortations to choose a better course are directed right.
No longer in politics (which reinforces your point), but one that comes to my mind is Mike Pence. Also, Amy Coney Barrett.
Fascinating. Thing is, I don't disagree with you, but I also can't think of a single national left-wing figure who credibly communicates that they will the good of their opponents.
I miss Barack Obama :'(
Inviting single people and young couples into the joy of family life is all well and good, but how does that make achieving family life more practical for young people? It is far more difficult for young people to buy houses today than it was decades ago, and as much as we want marriage to be the cornerstone, not capstone of adult life, family life can seem unattainable when buying, not a mansion, but a modest three bedroom two bathroom is out of reach. Although egg freezing is expensive, it’s less expensive than a house
Well, in my day job, I work on expanding the legality of infill and other ways to build housing, which I agree is one of the biggest affordability pressures on young families.
"Our job on the Right"-- you consider yourself "on the right" when you believe in the "dignity of dependence"? The only dependence the Right finds dignified is when the fetus is inside the uterus. Supporters of the Big Beautiful Bill abhor vulnerability.
Long time listener, first time caller 👋
Question for Matthew from a fellow former Baltimorean:
Loved your book overall, but would've liked to see psych meds get a more thorough/critical treatment. At one point in the section on the topic (I think around page 75), you called the "chemical imbalance" metaphor simplistic - but my understanding is that it's entirely unfounded, a marketing ploy with no research basis. Considering that as many as 1 in 6 American adults are taking a psych med now, and that the severity and frequency of adverse effects and withdrawal symptoms have been downplayed and understudied until recently... I would have loved to read more from you on all that. Care to poke that bear?
Thank you, Leah, for your perspective. Please keep writing and speaking.
I read the review of "Resisting Therapy Culture" with great interest. This topic has come up in a weekly zoom gathering on the topic of Revival, hosted by the OSL SC group. (OSL stands for the Order of St. Luke, the Physician), where I'm studying healing prayer. My first career (before becoming a blacksmith and then a painter) was as a facilitator of personal growth and as a consultant on organizational development. It took quite a long time for me to learn to invite the Holy Spirit into each group or workshop. Some of the OSL members in classes and other gatherings have successfully integrated therapy with healing prayer, just as many medical doctors do. It isn't easy. My current work is easier, because I know I can't make paintings with any healing power, and put them where people are disheartened, without Jesus and the Spirit. I'd drown in the waves of marketing advice.