Jul 29, 2023·edited Jul 29, 2023Liked by Leah Libresco Sargeant
For what it is worth... I love being a woman. Whatever my wins and losses in life overall, being a woman was one of the best parts of my life and I wouldn't trade it even if I could.
I haven't seen the Barbie movie yet... but one of the things I like about other feminisms is that this is one of the places where I feel we celebrate being women in all our glorious complexity without it being predicated on some need to always be in contrast, or worse conflict, with the masculine. This is a place where the message is being a woman is awesome! Thank you all for that.
I always loved being a woman but being on the second round on the carousel that is motherhood, I'm growing a bit disenchanted; not necessarily with being a woman but with what being a woman is supposed to imply.
Apparently, being a woman makes me the only person in the house capable of cleaning a window, cleaning a fridge or preparing any sort of meal without elaborate preparations. It seems that being a woman magically enables me to a) see when a wall needs to be repainted and b) repainting it. Having ovaries apparently goes hand in hand with being the sole person responsible for the state of the home.
I can't really say how this magic happens but it is much, much more annoying than the regularly occurring bits of female experience when my body spontaneously decides to do things without myself getting involved at all.
So, yay to being a woman; nay to carrying the baggage that being a woman brings with it.
Thanks for the link to the article - truer words have never been spoken, and of course it works both ways, which means that the man who can't clean a window feels disrespected and unloved if I don't pick up a pencil that somehow fell on the floor.
Barbie's totally on my list - I adored the trailers ("Hi Barbie!" - "Hi Barbie!" etc.) and, having spend much of my childhood painting my barbies and making them do the splits (or ripping their heards off), I feel I have a deep secret bond with Weird Barbie. :-)
The Barbie movie has the very same plot as The Velveteen Rabbit, and in that sense, is a positive message, I think. Barbie, like the Velveteen Rabbit, chooses to leave the silly games and dramas of being a toy for being real. And just as the Rabbit story hints that the Rabbit found love at the end after becoming real, so Barbie now has the capacity to be a lover, a wife, and a mother, as indicated by her final ob-gyn visit. Barbie has chosen to fully step into her real, female body, challenges and all, which desire is at the heart of all healthy forms of feminism. May her journey be blessed . . .
This is an excellent parallel. I thought the same thing - I wasn't able to read Leah's entire review at the Dispatch since I don't have an account, and I will concede the point that the movie has a LOT of things to say, and you could make a case that nearly all of them are underbaked. But I think Barbie's choice of a REAL, FEMALE body is powerful. She saw the real world. She saw how that body makes you a target of stares, and comments, and physical attacks. She could have chosen the safety of artificial plasticity and the infinite series of best days ever. But the real draw (and she says as much) is the ability to be a creator, and not just the created.
Also while we're talking about it, one thing has bothered me since I saw the (hilarious) trailer - the narrator makes it sound like before Barbie, all dolls were babies. This is categorically not true, and the simplification bugs me! But the final line was so subversively brilliant, and the casting for nearly every role was pitch-perfect, and the movie-going experience meant I spent two hours sitting next to one of my best friends while cracking up over and over again, so it was definitely an overall positive experience for me.
I love this line from Helen's piece: "Barbie is a movie about how being a woman is difficult, just like Lady Bird is about how being a mom is difficult. In both cases, the difficulty is worth it because it connects a person to the deepest kinds of love known to womankind, sisterhood and motherhood."
I agree that the movie was a bit meandering - it felt almost like an art piece - a kaleidoscopic romp -rather than a classic plot oriented Hollywood movie. And I appreciate that! Life is meandering, and I think handing Barbie an empty page at the end of figuring out what it means, for her, to be a woman is a beautiful thing.
I disagree with your take that the movie endorses Chu's perspective - I actually think it directly refutes the idea that “Everyone is female, and everyone hates it.” Sasha basically says the same when she first meets Barbie: she calls Barbie a fascist and says everyone hates women, that even women hate women. But Sasha is called into the sisterhood over the course of the film, and called into embracing her own place as a daughter and soon-to-be woman. She, like the other Barbies, passes through the despair of the patriarchy and into the possibility of owning her own identity fully.
And the final scene! The trip to the gynecologist? It's also a bit of a Rorschach test. Is she getting an IUD? Is she going to her first annual checkup? Is she going to get an introduction to sex ed? No one knows! But I love that that is how the film revealed that Barbie has not just decided to stay in the real world - she's now fully and complexly human with a potentially life giving womb to match. Her journey to humanity started with contemplating death, and, imo, ends with the very real possibility of her creating new life.
I feel like Sasha’s plot was storyboarded but not actually fleshed out for the movie. The film definitely has the bones of a story I’d have liked a lot more, but it’s too thinly told.
I'd be curious what you think after a second showing! The sisterhood I felt in the screening and long after wasn't the result of a 'let's fight the patriarchy that defines us!' antagonistic view of womanhood, but a deeply heartfelt celebration of our shared humanity *as women*.
There was a lovely moment in the parking lot after the screening where another mom (a complete stranger!) and I were pulling out and made eye contact and shared a brief smile & wave. But it was extraordinary! It felt exactly like the "Hey Barbie!" moments from the first part of the film, but brought to life. An "I see you, I support you, I am glad you are here" heartfelt exchange completely imbued with that powerful force of sisterhood. And I know I'm not alone in feeling the genuine impact of this film here in our Real World.
Leah, I am interested in your response to the opening scene. It seemed to say yes, to be free, to achieve our potential , we need to get rid of/kill our babies.
I think it was goofier and less didactic than that, tbh. It was an homage to 2001: A Space Odyssey, and, as the parent of two little girls, it seemed pretty accurate to the intense but fickle attachments they form to toys.
I think a tricky thing about the film is it’s not as compelling in it’s grounded register as it is in its hyperstylized one.
Thank you for this most intelligent reading. My feeling: you need to put enough distance between you and Barbie to see her fully. (After 5 decades, my daughter has finally forgiven me for not letting her have Barbie.)
So today I am watching a video (from back in March but still it is new to me) were one of the speakers is discussing how so many girls he has talked in the past few years with seem to be identifying as non-binary not because they actually want to be boys as much as it is that they don't want to be girls, so they are opting out of being either. I find this to be a highly plausible hypothesis which is also very troubling. How is it that after so many years of working so hard to make things better for the younger women who were coming after us, have we somehow made it even less appealing to be woman? Or is just that opting out wasn't a socially viable option 30 years ago?
Anyway it reminded me of the title of this review... and that we really do need to provide a path to winning for girls other than choosing not to play.
Ok this piece and all these comments make me want to see it again. The first time around I was like wow, this is a LOT😂 I felt like I couldn’t formulate an analysis of any kind
For what it is worth... I love being a woman. Whatever my wins and losses in life overall, being a woman was one of the best parts of my life and I wouldn't trade it even if I could.
I haven't seen the Barbie movie yet... but one of the things I like about other feminisms is that this is one of the places where I feel we celebrate being women in all our glorious complexity without it being predicated on some need to always be in contrast, or worse conflict, with the masculine. This is a place where the message is being a woman is awesome! Thank you all for that.
I always loved being a woman but being on the second round on the carousel that is motherhood, I'm growing a bit disenchanted; not necessarily with being a woman but with what being a woman is supposed to imply.
Apparently, being a woman makes me the only person in the house capable of cleaning a window, cleaning a fridge or preparing any sort of meal without elaborate preparations. It seems that being a woman magically enables me to a) see when a wall needs to be repainted and b) repainting it. Having ovaries apparently goes hand in hand with being the sole person responsible for the state of the home.
I can't really say how this magic happens but it is much, much more annoying than the regularly occurring bits of female experience when my body spontaneously decides to do things without myself getting involved at all.
So, yay to being a woman; nay to carrying the baggage that being a woman brings with it.
Solidarity, sister! Thank you for sharing. This read was really helpful to me, and many folks have shared it with partners to get them to understand the frustration & pain of these situations: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/she-divorced-me-i-left-dishes-by-the-sink_b_9055288
If you haven't watched Barbie yet, what you wrote above is basically the journey of the film!
Thanks for the link to the article - truer words have never been spoken, and of course it works both ways, which means that the man who can't clean a window feels disrespected and unloved if I don't pick up a pencil that somehow fell on the floor.
Barbie's totally on my list - I adored the trailers ("Hi Barbie!" - "Hi Barbie!" etc.) and, having spend much of my childhood painting my barbies and making them do the splits (or ripping their heards off), I feel I have a deep secret bond with Weird Barbie. :-)
Kate McKinnon is *brilliant* - Weird Barbie totally makes the movie imo <3
Weird Barbie was one of my favorite parts.
The Barbie movie has the very same plot as The Velveteen Rabbit, and in that sense, is a positive message, I think. Barbie, like the Velveteen Rabbit, chooses to leave the silly games and dramas of being a toy for being real. And just as the Rabbit story hints that the Rabbit found love at the end after becoming real, so Barbie now has the capacity to be a lover, a wife, and a mother, as indicated by her final ob-gyn visit. Barbie has chosen to fully step into her real, female body, challenges and all, which desire is at the heart of all healthy forms of feminism. May her journey be blessed . . .
This is an excellent parallel. I thought the same thing - I wasn't able to read Leah's entire review at the Dispatch since I don't have an account, and I will concede the point that the movie has a LOT of things to say, and you could make a case that nearly all of them are underbaked. But I think Barbie's choice of a REAL, FEMALE body is powerful. She saw the real world. She saw how that body makes you a target of stares, and comments, and physical attacks. She could have chosen the safety of artificial plasticity and the infinite series of best days ever. But the real draw (and she says as much) is the ability to be a creator, and not just the created.
Also while we're talking about it, one thing has bothered me since I saw the (hilarious) trailer - the narrator makes it sound like before Barbie, all dolls were babies. This is categorically not true, and the simplification bugs me! But the final line was so subversively brilliant, and the casting for nearly every role was pitch-perfect, and the movie-going experience meant I spent two hours sitting next to one of my best friends while cracking up over and over again, so it was definitely an overall positive experience for me.
Wait, Greta Gerwig is attached to a Narnia project?!
Two movies for Netflix! (The last I heard, they haven't announced which books).
The old BBC Silver Chair may be the best and only one we get of that book.
I love this line from Helen's piece: "Barbie is a movie about how being a woman is difficult, just like Lady Bird is about how being a mom is difficult. In both cases, the difficulty is worth it because it connects a person to the deepest kinds of love known to womankind, sisterhood and motherhood."
I agree that the movie was a bit meandering - it felt almost like an art piece - a kaleidoscopic romp -rather than a classic plot oriented Hollywood movie. And I appreciate that! Life is meandering, and I think handing Barbie an empty page at the end of figuring out what it means, for her, to be a woman is a beautiful thing.
I disagree with your take that the movie endorses Chu's perspective - I actually think it directly refutes the idea that “Everyone is female, and everyone hates it.” Sasha basically says the same when she first meets Barbie: she calls Barbie a fascist and says everyone hates women, that even women hate women. But Sasha is called into the sisterhood over the course of the film, and called into embracing her own place as a daughter and soon-to-be woman. She, like the other Barbies, passes through the despair of the patriarchy and into the possibility of owning her own identity fully.
And the final scene! The trip to the gynecologist? It's also a bit of a Rorschach test. Is she getting an IUD? Is she going to her first annual checkup? Is she going to get an introduction to sex ed? No one knows! But I love that that is how the film revealed that Barbie has not just decided to stay in the real world - she's now fully and complexly human with a potentially life giving womb to match. Her journey to humanity started with contemplating death, and, imo, ends with the very real possibility of her creating new life.
I feel like Sasha’s plot was storyboarded but not actually fleshed out for the movie. The film definitely has the bones of a story I’d have liked a lot more, but it’s too thinly told.
I'd be curious what you think after a second showing! The sisterhood I felt in the screening and long after wasn't the result of a 'let's fight the patriarchy that defines us!' antagonistic view of womanhood, but a deeply heartfelt celebration of our shared humanity *as women*.
There was a lovely moment in the parking lot after the screening where another mom (a complete stranger!) and I were pulling out and made eye contact and shared a brief smile & wave. But it was extraordinary! It felt exactly like the "Hey Barbie!" moments from the first part of the film, but brought to life. An "I see you, I support you, I am glad you are here" heartfelt exchange completely imbued with that powerful force of sisterhood. And I know I'm not alone in feeling the genuine impact of this film here in our Real World.
I just watched Barbie a second time and it was even better!
Hi Leah, thanks for starting the conversation. I wondered as I read what you might think of Amy Peeler’s take? https://www.holypost.com/post/neither-barbie-nor-ken
Leah, I am interested in your response to the opening scene. It seemed to say yes, to be free, to achieve our potential , we need to get rid of/kill our babies.
I think it was goofier and less didactic than that, tbh. It was an homage to 2001: A Space Odyssey, and, as the parent of two little girls, it seemed pretty accurate to the intense but fickle attachments they form to toys.
I think a tricky thing about the film is it’s not as compelling in it’s grounded register as it is in its hyperstylized one.
Thank you for this most intelligent reading. My feeling: you need to put enough distance between you and Barbie to see her fully. (After 5 decades, my daughter has finally forgiven me for not letting her have Barbie.)
So today I am watching a video (from back in March but still it is new to me) were one of the speakers is discussing how so many girls he has talked in the past few years with seem to be identifying as non-binary not because they actually want to be boys as much as it is that they don't want to be girls, so they are opting out of being either. I find this to be a highly plausible hypothesis which is also very troubling. How is it that after so many years of working so hard to make things better for the younger women who were coming after us, have we somehow made it even less appealing to be woman? Or is just that opting out wasn't a socially viable option 30 years ago?
Anyway it reminded me of the title of this review... and that we really do need to provide a path to winning for girls other than choosing not to play.
I do think Madonna had a pithy summary of it back in 2000 in the opening to her song "What it Feels Like for a Girl."
Girls can wear jeans and cut their hair short
Wear shirts and boots 'cause it's okay to be a boy
But for a boy to look like a girl is degrading
'Cause you think that being a girl is degrading
Ok this piece and all these comments make me want to see it again. The first time around I was like wow, this is a LOT😂 I felt like I couldn’t formulate an analysis of any kind